The Green Pill Podcast: Red Flags

When it comes to social relationships and dating, it’s important to set boundaries. There’s nothing wrong with that. While some boundaries are a great way to find the wheat in the chaffe, setting them too tightly will leave you complaining there are no options.

For example, one popular meme is the quest for the perfect 6-6-6-6. That is, being 6-foot tall (183 cm), having 6-pack abs, earning a 6-figure salary, and sporting at least 6 inches of masculinity. Having all these attributes together will mean you’re reducing your options to one in a million or less. Not to mention, such a guy is so flush with options, there’s no way he’s going to see you as the diamond in the rough. He will certainly be swiping left on all but the best women.

On the other hand, any guy who’s introduction mentions or implies sex, or sends a picture of his 6 inches, he’s definitely a creeper to be avoided. Guys, show some respect! If you’re just meeting a woman, be polite, and just say, “Hi.” Don’t try to push physical intimacy before you even get to know one another. Think about how you would feel if your sister or mother received such a message. Just don’t do that! Just say hello.

It’s still okay to have some superficial flags. I recognize that some women will consider my Picard pate a red flag. I’m happy for them to swipe left, as I have no interest in being with someone who can’t see past that, or appreciate the good Captain. Some men may swipe left on a woman who is rubenesque. I certainly am happy to swipe right on such women, but respect the men who swipe left and would tell these women they are better off not having a fat shamer, just as I’m better off not dating a bald-hater.

Also, how someone shows empathy, like how they treat wait staff, is a great red flag. If your date is rude to the server, by all means, end the date. If your date is not respectful of money, feel free to end that too. You have every right to set any red flag you want. Just be careful you don’t have too many or too few, and you’re not shooting yourself in the foot.

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