The Green Pill Podcast: Conventions

TimeHorse August 24, 2024 No Comments

Folks, this week I had to record a solo episode as Cat was pretty busy with their convention prep and rather than trying to shoe in an episode for our regular spot, we decided to instead see if we could do a live episode Sunday at 15:00 if we both feel up to it. Not saying we will, but you know how conventions are—or maybe you don’t—but they tend to wear you out!

What? You’ve never been to a convention? Well, don’t be shy, as that’s what I’ll be discussing in this week’s episode. Maybe you’ve never been to a convention—like the Doctor Who convention I’m currently attending—perhaps because there are none of your interest in your area. Don’t let that get you down because even informal conventions, like a basic meetup, can help you get out there and make new friends… and even potentially meet someone.

I know most of us who don’t already have someone special, are out there hoping to find love. There’s nothing wrong with that. You shouldn’t feel ashamed either that you have those desires or are unable to satisfy them. Even if your room is next to a happy couple enjoying each other heavily, intimately while you’re trying to record a podcast, don’t be jealous, be happy that, while they probably were once in your position, they found each other and you could find someone too.

Of course, we can’t know where you will find that special someone, and you should never put all your eggs in one basket. Sure, it may seem like there are a lot of opportunities on dating apps, and I did have one wonderful, long-term (6 months) relationship thanks to one of them, but there’s something to be said about meeting organically, through a convention or a meetup.

So get out there, and I hope you enjoy this week’s episode. And if you’re at Long Island Who, come see me at the Is Doctor Too Woke panel at 14:00, or Cat at one of their many panels!

The Green Pill Podcast: Mind Reading

TimeHorse August 17, 2024 No Comments

No, this episode won’t be teaching you how to do prestidigitation or cold reading. Well, at least, not exactly. I mean, yes, you can look at someone’s eyes, where they’re looking, or how they touch their face as tells for potential fabrication if not outright lying, but this isn’t about that. This is about the poor assumption whereby one person says nothing and expect you to know what they’re thinking, or maybe says one thing because they’re afraid to say the real truth.

The thing is, if something’s bothering you, the best way to correct that situation is not to bottle it up and hope the problem will fix itself. If you consider someone a friend, or, especially, a romantic partner, why wouldn’t you assume he or she could take the criticism. If that person cares about you, the sooner you try to correct behaviour you don’t approve of, the sooner it will either stop, or you just know someone who isn’t a true friend.

I see this a lot with couples. The old cliché goes, one partner says everything is alright, and the other takes that at face value. Think about how much quicker you could get a shoulder to cry on, or an ear for venting if you just spoke up and stated your real concerns? I can’t state it more clearly, if you’re worried how someone will react, maybe it’s indicative of something more fundamental. After all, we can have friends who we don’t consider close. If you don’t trust someone to have your back, maybe it’s time for a reevaluation.

I remember I had this amazing Author friend who write and published recently a really amazing book. We were both in the throws of divorce considerations and we bonded over that. But then I started acting in ways which bothered her, and I wasn’t even aware until it was too late. Had I known I was being too rude, I would have instantly changed my behavior. But, because she didn’t tell me what I was doing was bothering her, we just stopped being friends altogether. I’m sorry to lose such a great friend but I wish her well and am so proud of her success as a published author.

Now, will Cat and I someday be as successful as YouTube broadcasters… or will you have to start reading our minds because this could be our very last episode…

The Green Pill Podcast: Long-Term Relationships

TimeHorse August 10, 2024 No Comments

In our podcast we often talk about issues around dating. This is mainly because we expect our audience to be still rather youthful and still finding themselves out and we want to be here to help you guys do that. But, life isn’t just about body counts and statistics. Indeed, there’s nothing more fulfilling, more oxytocin inducing than a long-term relationship. Even intimate relationships are improved when you know your partner like the back of your hand.

Long-Term relationships come in many forms. The most common and well-known form is of course marriage, be it between a man and a woman, a woman and a woman, or a man and a man. I, personally was happily married for 18 years and the marriage only ended when SARS-CoV-2 struck and all that time together caused us to move apart. I still consider my ex to be one of my best friends though, and neither of us hold animosity toward the other for desolving the union. I consider myself quite fortunate in that respect.

But, the thing is, what I have with my ex is still a long-term relationship, it’s just one of the more powerful connecter of friendship. Long-Term friendships are the best and being able to have those conversations without speaking can be a quite deep conversation.

If, however, you’re both interested in something more than friendship, but not yet ready for marriage, there are still institutions and protocols which can bind two—or more (always with ENM!)—people in a loving, Long-Term relationship. Whether it be living together, civil union, common-law marriage, or just a casual, 6-month relationship, having the longevity brings stability, understanding, and peace. There is, after all, nothing wrong with aspiring to be or be with a Tradwife.

That said, be mindful of your own self-worth. There are people out there who will use and abuse you, and not all long-term relationships are healthy. If you’re being physically and/or emotionally abused, there are people out there who can help you restore to you some common human dignity.

Nonetheless, despite the risks, long-term relationships are worth it, and every second with your partner(s) is all that much better with someone to share! So, why not share in the discussion?

The Green Pill Podcast: Partner Shaming

TimeHorse August 2, 2024 No Comments

It used to be you’d just gossip among friends and while some circles would try to be positive, others wanted to vent and venting would sometimes lead to realization that it’s time to get out and sista be helping. But most of the time, it was self-deprecating aggrandising of the other in your tight-knit circle that was only y’all and not for anyone else to see.

Then, SARS-CoV-2 came and changed everything and we all went online. No more could we see our girlfriends to discuss our private concerns. We went public and started the epidemic of Partner Shaming, especially on TikTok, and it has never been more rampant in this day and age. The tight-knit group has become the a window into our private lives through the 6-inch (20 cm) screen. We are becoming addicted to likes on social media and seeking digital clout to the point where what was once considered embarrassing is now considered the way to get the most views. And there’s nothing more embarrassing than insulting your supposed loved one by pointing out their flaws and using weaponized incompetence. Chasing likes is just not a healthy way of living.

Worst of all, what if your shamed partner actually finds out about your insulting videos? Videos where you have dozens if not hundreds of likes and comments telling you to leave the bastard. What happens then? Do you think your partner will wise up and be better, or will they feel hurt and even start considering the advice of your followers, and file for divorce. Will you end up having to make a mea culpa episode where you try to take it all back to save your marriage? Sista, don’t make that mistake because your followers won’t be switching side so easily and may still be wishing you to end that relationship. And woe be you if you listen to them.

Folks, just don’t partner shame unless you want to get out of a bad relationship. I know that for me, when I aired my dirty laundry it was not cool. It made people say I should end my relationship. But, in the end I did end it, but I did so not because I hated my ex, but because I love her like a dear friend, and I knew that being just friends was the best for us.

The first 5 Series of Doctor Who (1963–1968)

TimeHorse July 29, 2024 No Comments

Folks, I’ve slowly been keeping up with my rewatch of Doctor Who from the beginning. As of 29 July, 2024 in fact, I’ve completed watching all of the original five series, in order, with up to 3 viewings of each one.

The thing is, I try to get as close to broadcast quality as I can, and if the original still exists in the archive, then I just watch the original. But if the original doesn’t exist, then there’s often a version produced by Loose Cannon Productions, which used original audio and photos and clips, as well as occasional new footage at the original location. I consider that to be the gold standard of video recreation and is always the last of the editions I watch, typically on the Dailymotion channel, ElDoctorio channel, cleverly named David Agnew, a pseudonym used by freelance writers like Douglas Adams.

I also watched the BBC official Telesnaps, in addition to the Loose Cannon, though they are always an inferior product. And when Loose Cannon wasn’t available, I tried to watch a version from Who Recons, though, but that isn’t my preference.

I have also been watching the commercially available Animations. I watch those in full HD aspect ratio and colour. However, if the commercially available animation exists, even for an existing episode, I watched that as well as the Loose Cannon. Sometimes there are also fan-made animations and I try to watch those too, but they’re not my favourite, and I watch only if no official animation exists, such as with The Wheel in Space, Episodes 1, 2, 4, and 5, where I watched BBC Telesnap, Fan Animation, and Loose Canon.

Finally, there is one story which has been lovingly produced as a live-action dramatization. It was produced by the students and graduates of The University of Central Lancashire, with an introduction by Edward de Souza. I watched this video with my Mission to the Unknown viewing.

The thing is, when Series 5 ended, it ended with The Wheel in Space showing a clip from The Evil of the Daleks. And, before The Dominators was broadcast, the BBC rebroadcast the entire 7-part story over 9 weeks in the summer of 1968. Of course, I wasn’t going to insert another week of episodes into my 2.5 year schedule just to accommodate this. Fortunately, The Wheel in Space, Episode 6 was scheduled for a Saturday, meaning before I watched The Dominators, Episode 1 on Sunday, I could binge rewatch The Evil of the Daleks again, of course from Loose Cannon telesnaps and the original BBC copy of Episode 2. There’s no way I would have watched the animation again because The Beatles won’t let the BBC play their music in Doctor Who. As a Paperback Writer, I vehemently protest! Yet another reason I prefer Loose Cannon, because they get it right!

Watching the entire 7 parts on that Sunday, things made more sense when I subsequently watched The Dominators, Episode 1, later that evening. Specifically, Zoe asks the Doctor if his mind hurt after projecting the entire story. Why would it hurt? After all, the Doctor got to enjoy that lovely, haunty incidental score by Dudley Simpson again.

I also have a note about the recently released The Celestial Toymaker animation. Since this came out after I’d watched the telesnaps and original part 4, I wasn’t able to watch it then. However, as I enter the 1970s, with originally broadcast, full-colour, 26-stores per year, vs. the 40 or so from the 1960s, I decided to schedule it as a double-header. As I watch the four parts of Spearhead from Space in September, I will also be watching The Celestial Toymaker animation, with episodes 1:1. This works out well as both are 4-part stories. And that will hopefully be the last time in this rewatch that I ever double up any viewings!

I hope.

The Green Pill Podcast: Don’t Be A Fixer

TimeHorse July 26, 2024 No Comments

Has this ever happened to you? You’re feeling bad about something and you don’t want to think about the solution because you kind of already know what that is. So you vent, wishing to just air your dirty laundry and receive a modicum of sympathy…

Suddenly, your post gets dozen notifications full of unasked solutions. You’re distraught enough and you just can’t take it. You hang your head in shame because you didn’t make it clear enough you only wanted to vent. Instead, you got a bunch of Fixers telling you what to do and driving you even deeper into loneliness and isolation.

But, now consider the other side. Your friend cries out in a post and you want to do whatever you can to make it better. A logical brain may consider applying a advice from Wizard’s First Rule: “Think of the solution, not the problem”. And, thinking of that answer you see it the best way to help so you post it in a comment, only to get a dislike emoji by the friend you thought you were helping. You’ve just become a fixer.

To be clear, sometimes people with issues do want solutions. Sometimes folks are looking for advice and would accept it quite willingly. But other times, a rant is just a rant. It’s best if you want a positive result for your lament to be clear what you want.

And in person, read the facial expression. Be open to your partner opening up and get to know when they just want to vent and when they generally want advice. It’s an old trope of the wife gets home and complains about her day, and the husband is just thinking how he can fix his wife’s problems. Show her you’re listening by agreeing and saying how bad things are, but unless she asks for council, don’t give it. She just wants to vent. And, for the record, men sometimes want to vent too, and women sometimes are fixers. It’s not just men who are fixers.

All that said, we’re here to fix your problems if you’ll let us, so have a listen on how you can avoid falling into the trap and not be a Fixer!

The Green Pill Podcast: Sprinkle Sprinkle, Drizzle Drizzle

TimeHorse July 19, 2024 No Comments

Two weeks ago, we spoke about the problems with Grand Gestures, but we hinted there was more to this story and now we’re able to share with you the root cause of why some folks are expecting nothing less than some grand gesture on a first date.

This goes back to a recent movement you can find, especially, on TikTok. What it comes down to is, if you can’t give her that princess treatment on date 1, can’t be paying her rent and her bills and her car insurance as well as her daily meals, so long brother, she’ll find someone who will.

Of course, many men are aware of this movement and have come up with a large number of parodies. Again, you need look no farther than TikTok to find numerous bros talking about not settling for women who won’t pay their keep and shower them with gifts. For the most part, all these men are just making parody videos to counterpoint the women with their TikTok sprinkle sprinklings. And, let’s be honest, some women on TikTok are doing it ironically too because, on the surface, it is kind of funny!

But, the thing is, it does happen in real life. There are women’s magazines talking about how women deserve no less than the Taylor Swift treatment by her boo Travis Kelce. Ladies who expect those Grand Gestures to show you’re worthy. And, while they are perfectly entitled to want that, you’re perfectly entitled to not tolerate someone who acts entitled to it. It makes him no better than a Success Object.

And, if that term sounds familiar, well, it is, because it’s the flip side of treating women as nothing more than Sex Objects. My sista, I know you don’t want to be reduced to a one-dimensional sex-object. So please, let’s not flatten men to just a single Success Object status.

The Green Pill Podcast: Friendzone

TimeHorse July 12, 2024 No Comments

Folks, I want to keep this short as this week has been crazy busy and I’m even late posting this update. Can someone clone me so I can have some staff to help out with all I do? After all, I still don’t have any book scheduled for the Science Book Club August meeting! And I need to get back to work as we have deadlines I need to meet!

Anyway, Friendzones are a great option when he or she or they just aren’t into you! I have this one person in my writing group who I’m extremely attracted to because they’re so skilled and clever but that person isn’t interested at all in me romantically so I’ve just decided to be the best friend I can be because Friendship can be forever!

I hope you will enjoy this episode.

The Green Pill Podcast: Grand Gestures

TimeHorse July 5, 2024 6 Comments

If you’re thinking that person you fancy will finally notice you by going to their window and serenading your live like Cyrano de Bergerac, don’t be surprised if you spend the night in the local jail.

This week we’re talking about Grand Gestures. If you learned all your did about romance from the movies of the 1980s by John Hughes, you’ve been led astray. Your perceptions of what constitutes a proper romance should not come from the sped-up narrative of the film narrative. Granted, The Princess Bride constitutes one of the most romantic descriptions of love and dedication, but the epic journeys of Westley and Buttercup work in literature because there are many trials and tribulations which both protagonists go through and the audience is aching for their reunion, with the process being the real narrative. But, life isn’t a movie!

In the real world, people have lives and aren’t being kidnapped by Dread Pirates Robert and getting advice from Miracle Max. In the real world, it takes time to build a relationship. You need to begin slowly; you can’t run before you can walk. It goes back to our advice on Icebreakers. Nothing works better than a simple “Hello”.

Of course, we’re not saying a trip to Paris six-months into a long-term relationship is unwarranted. By all means, if you have and established relationship, please keep having grand adventures together. But, if you’re expecting to be taking on an all-expense paid trip to Austin , TX for the last Solar Eclipse in the United States (outside of the Alaskan North) for the next two decades as a first date, you’re probably barking up the wrong tree. Not saying there won’t be guys who will shell out for that, but who knows what he would be expecting in return, and why risk that. Best for everyone to slow things down, and except that good things come to those who wait.

And definitely don’t go making those grand gestures expecting anything but a legal smackdown. You want them to notice you, just walk up and introduce yourself!

The Green Pill Podcast: Bear vs. Bro

TimeHorse June 27, 2024 No Comments

You’ve no doubt heard the hue and cry from women all over the Internet exploding with memes and comments saying without a doubt they’d choose meeting the bear in the woods rather than the bloke.

As gentlemen, we need to hold our hurt back. There is only one thing we can do with respect to women honestly confessing their concerns over strange men, and that is to be an ally, standing up, promising that if we see something, we will say something and we will not let all the things women are afraid of, from that strange man, continue.

After all, that strange man could be a rapist, a molester, a thief, a bully, a violent thug, a leering creep, or almost anything. And the bear, well, that bear doesn’t care about you, or may even be afraid of us 2-leggers with their noisy sticks that they call rifles. Believe me, most bears just want to do bear things and leave us humans alone. Only if you approach it, or get between a momma bear and her cub, will you likely see violence from our furry ursine forest creature.

When you keep all those things in mind, is it any wonder why many women choose the bear?

But, you may ask, did I just say many? Don’t I mean all? No, that’s the fallacy. In truth, many women have experienced misogyny or violence or sexually violence from men. They know in their core that, that man in the forest could be just like her abuser. Survivors certainly understand why the bear is safer. But, for women, they have lived a happier life, with their only male interactions being positive and beneficial. For them, men are safe, and will choose the man, especially if they don’t think the bear is.

My therapist and I had a nice discussion about this, and she agrees that women are valid for choosing bear, but for her, a man is safer because she has had a very good life. And she understands that, it’s no different than when we dismiss race without consideration of their struggle just because we don’t personally do racist things.

Now, if you’re an INCEL, you’re probably reading this and making it about your struggles. Cut that out. I get it, it’s hard when you spend your life working up the courage to ask out a girl, only to be repeatedly rejected, and here the women are saying you’re part of the problem and she’d rather be with a bear than you. I understand why this hurts. I understand why you feel this is just more of the narrative of women stepping on men and treating us as second-class citizens. But we’re not!

And this isn’t about you. We have a whole episode on Loneliness and I suggest you watch that before you go claiming vindication from some bear meme because believe me, you have missed the point if you still feel this way. This is a case of women speaking up and being honest about their struggles with awful men, men like those Red Pill and Black Pill folks who see women as commodities to be bartered and traded. Women are people, and they are suffering. Please listen to them, listen to how scary we men are to them, and join me in fixing that by being better men, hearing women, and understanding why many choose the bear.

And those are the bear necessities!